Stoned Swami Feature : The Tuition Tribulation

First an introduction. Yo peeps. I am the one known as the Stoned Swami. I wanted to make an attempt at making a blog entry, so I thought, " let's put it on the Dead Poet's blog, so that if the piece bombs, it will be obscured by his comparatively more experienced and fairly frequent entries." Hope you guess like it enough for me to be encouraged enough to maybe start my own blog. So here's my piece on a pretty common topic.


The Tuition Tribulation

Ah yes. Tuition. The scourge of my social life. The barrier between the Dead Poet and his downloaded Glee episodes. The reason why most people's (usually redundant) beauty sleep time is trespassed upon.

Tuition to me is like a vast expense of quicksand through which I must trudge through, just so that I can come home, get yelled at (by an assortment of maids, concerned elders and the occasional neglected dog), and then crash onto my extremely lumpy (but by then blissful) heavily abused mattress.

You know, today, whilst desperately fighting (in vain) against several extremely "healthy" people (who look like Florida residents to me) for both air and space to write, I noticed how, many members of our exasperated generation sat there, like worn out war veterans, suffering under fans that were nothing more than miserable excuses as cooling equipments, cramped in little plastic chairs (that were highly un-ergonomic, if there is such a word), huddled over books (quite like homeless tramps in the winter around a fire), under the stern eye of a very well paid teacher-cum-Hitler impersonator with bewildered expressions that seemed almost comical had it not been for the apsphyxiating circumstances.(Damn,long sentence) And I wondered how of them actually learned something? Sure, there are always the exceptions, the brainy ones who often resemble grumpy librarians with granny glasses (Okay, so I am being stereotypical. Depp down, aren't we all?) and who secretly take pride in the fact that their copies are vigourously copied from. But by and large, most of us don't really manage much, right? I mean, you may differ, but still, think about it. As we traverse through class after class, like stationery-oriented Indiana Jones'es, how much do those gray cells manage to absorb? We never get time for homework, or
time to study for exams, or time to fulfill our social cravings. Most tuition places disapprove of any interaction between students during class in a manner similar to a Nazi disapproving of films produced by Jewish chaps. School's the only time we get to have any sort of contact with our peeps, apart from any phone conversations. Of course the phone itself is a tantalizing object whose gloriously unused keypad, these days, is seen less frequently than the passing unicorn.

So, food for thought, and I want comments, what can be done to actually make sure that we learn something at these wretched places? Let's face it, tuition is a fact of life, so might as well as get some use out of it. After all, the more we learn from tuition, the more extra sheets at an exam we will require, the more we will be able to bet on our report cards not having a red mark, and the more we will be able to avail the greater necessities in life- phones, movies, dates, and malls.

So see you when I see you,

Dah Stoned Swami

PS- I hope you chaps get the Awesama Ocean's 13 reference I just put in.